I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
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