So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
they're like a gay fantastic four
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
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