You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
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