We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
