OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
Randomize