I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Randomize
