How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
When I start carrying a bottle in my hand, jumping from boat to boat with a grenade horn. YOU should know this isn't going to turn out well.
Everyone already knows you're a drunk, they understand.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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