u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
Pregnant stripper...not hot.
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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