She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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