I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
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