you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
Randomize
