I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
Randomize