I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated.
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
Randomize
