The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
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