I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
