she was so not down for the gang bang
it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
Randomize
