Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(781): View more from Massachusetts

btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry

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(815): View more from Illinois

There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.

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(940): View more from Texas

just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it

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(701): View more from North Dakota

My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...

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(850): View more from Florida

We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.

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(813): View more from Florida

Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?

(203): View more from Connecticut

everyone's regretting their thursdays.

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(440): View more from Ohio

Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"

(1-440): View more from Ohio

Perfectly normal.

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(260): View more from Indiana

Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.

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(803): View more from South Carolina

Have you considered murder?

(757): View more from Virginia

Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy

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