Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
smell my finger.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
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