his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
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