I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
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