ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize
