M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
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