Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
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