Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
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