whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
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