big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
she pinky promised me she was 18
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
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