So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize
