She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
Randomize
