woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
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