I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
Apparently karate chopping the fronts off all the paper towel and soap dispensers in the bathrooms isn't even frowned upon. Like even at the third bar when I fell flat on my back trying to jump kick the last one some guy just helped me up and high fived me. America.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Randomize
