We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize