So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
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