I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
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