"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
Randomize
