you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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