you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
I left his apartment Bc I lost my id. Wandered 5 miles barefoot. Got lost in downtown la. My phone died so I asked for directions from a man at the gas station.. Turns out he was a bum. He led me back to the apartment AND he found my id.
It's like the whiskey god was watching over you
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
tell me about the eggs
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