dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
Randomize
