Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
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