The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
Randomize
