i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize