Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
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