So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
Life lesson: if you fart while talking to a girl outside, the smell does not dissipate, it just lingers around mocking you
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
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