apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You pole danced in your parka.
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
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