Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
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