D3 body, D1 cock
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
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