Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
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