you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
She came home wasted 'not wantin to talk about it' so for revenge I woke her up with a dutch oven and she puked all over me and the bed. I can't win.
Dude I told you 22 year olds shouldn't get married
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize
