His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
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