Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Randomize
