Dude someone changed all the contacts in my phone to I Like Eggs
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
Randomize
